Let's rant together, ye ye ye! ^^

If you feel that happiness is just an arm away, would you stretch further and grab it?
If you think it's your last chance, would you let it slip away?

What if it is happiness you're seeking, and happiness you will attain just by stretching a bit more, only, that happiness is just a breath long and there's nothing you can do about it? Would you still dare touch it?

If you realize that once you've touched it and cherished it, that you'd be drawn to it forever and there's no turning back, would you still long for it?

Would you still reach out knowing full well that, as time goes by, it grows shorter and somewhere, somehow it IS bound to stop and it will stop whether prepared or unprepared you are?

Would you torture yourself with having a happiness you can never enjoy forever, OR a happiness that is non-existent all throughout? Sad yet half-awake? Happy yet half-dead?

If you know that you might be, JUST MIGHT BE, getting a shot at it and maybe, JUST MAYBE, be happy forever, would you deem it true? Or would you rather accept a big fat hug and a wave plus a tissue box, coupled with a stick of cigarette and a cup of coffee and be done with it?

What would have been will never be thought and be forgotten and yet there is that spark intentionally put out to save a little of what's left and there you hang on and never look back because you can't and you won't and you stumble to your bed and you're lonesome because you failed and you know you will fail though you'll never try just to see if you could but you wouldn't because it's futile and yet it's not and it's dream-like but it hurts so much to be considered unreal and you toss and you turn and you'll never get over it and you know it because you've reached out and you stretched, for the life of you, you stretched and you grabbed it and accepted it to be yours and you wake to find that it's not and you can't make out the funny feeling anymore because it's just plain funny now and yet you can't laugh and you sob and you drink and you cry and you light a cigar that you can't get out of your system because it drowns you better than a shot of whiskey and you ask countless questions that you know aren't there but you make them so and they appear and it can't leave, no it can't, and it stays and you disgust yourself with your own thoughts, your own wants and needs and yet you forgive what's left to forgive and you try and sleep but you can't and you'll never be able to dream like the dreams you used to have, awake from that

One

True

Fantasy

and it doesn't bother you at all, or so you thought because it does because it hurts and you-just-can't-stop.

...

..

.

But

You eventually will.

Foolish child.

READ: Filler. Try and recollect. Look for something. Found it? Post it. Good riddance!

I want to know.

Pero I wouldn't want to waste my last stick.. I'll let someone else do that for me.. Tonight perhaps? ^^

My cellphone stopped ringing hours ago.. It almost got to me. Almost. Buti na lang...
Now I want to watch something, or atleast drink milk, para ma antok.. They say smoking can make you feel dizzy, eventually making you feel sleepy. Really? Hmm..

Sunrise is good. I can almost see it pero nahh.. I won;t stay up to see it. So PUFF TAYO to the max! Get this over with nang makatulog na.

My mug is half empty, di ko na maubos coffee ko. I'll just throw it. Di ko na kaya.

I'm thinking of packing na before I sleep. Pero, wala ng will to do so. It can wait. Gabi pa naman ako alis eh. And kela Diane naman so kahit walang damit, okay na. I used to hate not being ready. Heck, I never wanted to be not ready. Things change. And change is amazingly good.

So anong topic mamya cousin?

I can't smile hard enough. ^^

Palakpakan muna! ^^

Okay, so umpisa na naman ako ng walang hanggang "Hope Marathon". Sus, when will I ever learn? Okay lang yan, habang humihinga, go lang! Go for the Gold! ^_^

Talk Chat tau..

Care to chat? Sure. Chat lang pala eh. ^_^ Harmless harmless. ^_^

Anong meron sa chat? Tao. What's good about it? Maisasalba mo ang iyong sanity for a bit, each day. You get to meet alot of people for a very low price. Tapos all you need is a load of topics just to keep them interested to talk to you. How convenient is that?

But wait... May catch.. Dapat ready ka din for anything.

Lalo na when they pop the question: "May FS ka?"

Nakupo.

We all know na some chatters mean no harm, like, they just want additional friends sa nationwidest na accesible site called friendster.com. Or, some just wants to see if the person they're talking to is really what the person say they are. For safety purposes ba.

Pero since hindi lahat gifted with a nice smile sa harap ng lente, most would prefer to have their profile pictures in abstract form *eherm*. Or naka private ang album nila. Invi mode. ^^

I was never confident. Bibo, pero hindi confident. Differentiate? Bibo, pang inuman. Confident, pang landian. Clear na? Good. ^_^

So yun, I was never the "Come, let's have the time of our lives!!" kind of person. I simply enjoy the moment. Ang chatroom ay parang heaven on earth sa akin. No commitments, kasi di ka naman compelled to log in everyday. You get to enjoy and live for the moment. Dahil bukas, malamang wala na yang k-chat mo. Or, iba na nick. ^_^

So balik tau sa tanong: "May FS ka?"

Opo. Meron. Thanks to my cousin.

"Yep, add me up?"

"Sure."

Yan na.. add na. At this point, dapat ready ka na, with your big sword, your galloping horse and your medieval chariot. Marami kasing possible scenario after that, I'll just name three, that for my opinion, are the MOST common.

WIN mode.
Obviously, it's a win. The person will keep talking to you. Type ka ata. Haha, lucky! Although ctc means care to chat, sa ibang tao it also means, "I'll chat you up if you pass." Not true? Puh~leaze.
Pero since WIN mode ka, makikipag usap pa yan sa'yo and even end up flirting with you. Pasa kasi ang face mo eh. Smile naman d'yan!^_^

FRIEND mode.
Hmm.. madalas 'to. The person will keep talking to you. Calm and very peaceful ang atmosphere. Pero since hindi ka nya type, no flirting dito. Meron siguro pero.. nahh.. Dito ka uumpisahang tawaging dude, or start na siya magkwento about her ex/current person she likes and so on. Random usapan n'yo. Random din ang inputs. Random. ^_^ Parang ibbroadcast nya, in a subtle way, na "We're friends. Just friends. Get it?" Ikaw naman, matuwa ka na. Chat lang naman pinunta mo dito, diba? ^^

and last on my list:

BLANK mode.
Isang matinding palakpakan, ladies and gents! Dahil ang k-chat mo, nawala na. Amen? Amen! ^_^ Nuf said. 'Lam mo na yun. Konti lang yung ganito, at madali silang ma is-spot-an. Madalas, I repeat, MADALAS, kapag pm mo sila, and you say "Care to chat?", bago pa kayo magkaroon ng decent topic, eto na agad tanong n'ya:

"May FS ka?"

^_^

So yun, tatlong common reaction na, for me, ay talaga naman identifiable.

Wala namang masama sa tanong di ba? Beats the purpose nga lang of the word "ctc". Kasi nga, chat lang naman eh, di ba? Need ba nating magkakitaan agad?? ^_^ Unless gusto mo lang talaga ng friends sa FS mo. OR, unless you're expecting something more sa chat. Ibang topic na yun. I have no say on that.

I also expect, pero duh? .... I doubt it. Hope Marathon ito. Kakadepress din. But yeah, live for the moment ang chatter. Enjoy the flow. Ngiti lang tayo.

Bakit Cloud9 classic? Kasi masarap yun, try mo. Mura pa. ^_^

Read: Opinion ko 'to, and blog ko 'to. Yung iba, exxag na lang just for the fun of writing it. Lahat ng nk-chat ko, I'm happy with the result. I like some, pero.. nahhh.. Sabi sa'yo, Hope Marathon to. ^^